Building Positivity: A Dad’s Journey To Mentorship And Fitness

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In a heartfelt and candid episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast Dr Christopher Lewis engages in an inspiring conversation with Joe Martin the owner of Relentless Positivity Fitness and a dedicated father As Joe reflects on his journey as both a father and a mentor to middle school-aged children he emphasizes the importance of perseverance positivity and building strong relationships The discussion delves into Joe s personal struggles triumphs and the profound impact of leading by example in fatherhood and fitness Mentoring and Building Relationships Joe Martin sheds light on the pivotal role of mentoring particularly with middle school-aged children recognizing this age group s vulnerability and potential He stresses the significance of trusted resources outside the home like a coach in connecting with kids and fostering meaningful relationships Joe s emphasis on building relationships with children through shared activities and finding common ground underscores the powerful impact of positive mentorship Fitness and Overcoming Challenges As the owner of Relentless Positivity Fitness Joe Martin s passion for fitness emanates from his experiences as an athlete where he battled weight gain and injury during his football career Through his own fitness journey Joe not only overcame adversity but also redefined his identity His journey serves as a testament to the transformative power of perseverance and the impact of modeling a healthy lifestyle for children Personal Transformation and Resilience Joe Martin s openness about his past struggles including arrests and incarceration offers a poignant insight into his journey of redemption and personal transformation His determination to change his lifestyle while initially centered on weight loss ultimately led to a holistic transformation reinforcing the importance of resilience in overcoming adversity Parenting and Fatherhood The conversation pivots to the challenges and triumphs of fatherhood with Joe Martin eloquently articulating the emotional journey of watching his son embark on a new chapter at the Air Force Academy Through his vulnerability Joe emphasizes the importance of allowing children to fail sharing personal struggles and prioritizing one s spouse in parenting His candid reflections resonated with Dr Christopher Lewis and emphasized the depth of emotional investment inherent in fatherhood The Power of Positivity and Community Joe Martin s dedication to spreading positivity is not confined to fitness but permeates his podcast and book both titled Relentless Positivity During the conversation the significance of countering negativity with uplifting narratives and inspiring stories becomes evident His book combining personal experiences with lessons on fitness and back pain management emphasizes flexibility and inspiration over rigid approaches underscoring the value of a positive mindset Fatherhood Insider and Community Engagement Dr Christopher Lewis invites dads to join the Fatherhood Insider a valuable resource and encourages involvement in the Dads with Daughters Facebook community This proactive approach seeks to foster a supportive environment where fathers can learn from each other s experiences gaining insights and strengthening their roles as active participants in their daughters lives The engaging conversation with Joe Martin encompasses the profound impact of mentorship fitness and positive parenting His journey from adversity to resilience coupled with his unwavering dedication to fatherhood and positivity serves as an inspiring example to all By amplifying the importance of building strong relationships personal transformation and embracing a mindset of relentless positivity Joe Martin s narrative resonates deeply with the mission of Dads with Daughters in promoting and empowering positive father-daughter relationships TRANSCRIPT Dr Christopher Lewis 00 00 05 Welcome to Dads With daughters In this show we spotlight dads resources and more to help you be the best dad you can be Dr Christopher Lewis 00 00 16 Welcome back to the dads with daughters podcast where we bring you guests to be active participants in your daughters lives raising them to be strong independent Women Really excited to have you back again this week As always every week you and I are on a journey together You know I ve got 2 daughters You ve Got Daughters We re on this fatherhood journey together and we re doing the things that we can do to be able to be the best dads that we wanna be And the That comes with work that comes with some hard work that comes through the days the weeks the months the years that the You go side by side with your children to be able to help them to be the people that you re hoping that they become and you don t have to do this alone I ve said that Numerous times and I will continue to say it Dr Christopher Lewis 00 01 03 There are so many other dads out there that are going through the same journey And they struggle with very similar things and they go about fatherhood in different ways And that s why it s so important that we have these conversations that we sit down we Dog Talk about it We build a community for you to be able to meet other dads learn from them because there s no one right way the father There s many different ways that people do father and you learn along the way You learn as things change in your life in your kids life And you can learn from the dads around you but you can also learn from dads through things like this That s why every week I love being able to Dog Dr Christopher Lewis 00 01 42 Talk with you sit down with you and bring you different guests with different perspectives different experiences that can help You to think about fatherhood in a little bit different way This week we ve got another great guest with us Joe Martin is the owner of Relentless Positivity Fitness He teaches in person as well as online classes He s won several awards including Huntsville s healthiest trainer Huntsville s healthiest male The Relentless Positivity Fitness was was just recently voted the best place in Huntsville to work out and his book the Relentless positivity hit the Amazon s bestseller list Now we re gonna learn a little bit more about that but he has a long journey of being a athlete and working in fitness and found also at one point he was above 50 pounds overweight And I I think all of us at one point in life can probably look at that and look at ourselves and say are we where we wanna be and how is that impacting us as men But also how is that impacting us as fathers And it s a it becomes a turning point for yourself and it was a turning point for Joe too Dr Christopher Lewis 00 02 47 So I m really excited to be able to to learn from him today learn from him as a father He s a father of a son who is just about to go off to the Air Force Academy and he s gonna grow He s gonna fly off the nest here to go and do go into the next phase of his life Doug So he is going through when I what I told you I was going through last year So I m really excited to talk to him to learn from him and to share him with you Joe thanks so much for being here today Joe Martin 00 03 14 Dog I m really excited to be here We talked a little bit before we we started that there s no instruction manual when it comes to being a dad So what you re doing is so important Building strong dads out there that can build strong daughters Doc It s so important It kinda you know that old Frederick Douglass quote talked about it It s it s much easier to build strong children than it is to fix or or repair a broken man or a Woman Joe Martin 00 03 32 I m in the fitness world so I ve been training women exclusively for 15 years And a lot of the stuff they re dealing with as adults goes back to childhood What you re doing right now helping people cut that off before it ever happens man It s so important So I appreciate what you re doing out there Dr Christopher Lewis 00 03 44 So now I usually start with some conversations to talk about the What it was like to be a father of a daughter You don t have that experience but you do have a you were a father of a son So talk to let s go back a little bit Let s talk a little bit about that journey that you ve been on the And what you ve had to learn along the way So let s turn the clock back Your son is a senior in high school and as you think back to that first moment the first moment when you found out that you were going to be a father what was going through Doug Joe Martin 00 04 07 Man all the emotions All of them You think oh my gosh I m not ready I m excited I need to make more money I need to be less busy All these things are going through your head Joe Martin 00 04 16 Doc You don t know what to expect You know anytime you you re doing something new all the fear comes in Also a lot of excitement and I was really excited about being a dad I had amazing parents growing up So I kinda I got modeled that growing up I was excited to give it a shot And I was the 1st in my family to have a kid man Joe Martin 00 04 29 So it s very exciting I ve got 2 brothers and 1 older 1 younger So I was like kind of the first one So no one the They couldn t ask my brothers about us you know but I ve got a lot of people around me that really helped me out But mainly it was just the overwhelming thing with excitement and gratitude just be able to have this chance to be a dad Dr Christopher Lewis 00 04 43 Now fatherhood is never Always roses It s not always easy You go through peaks and valleys as you go along Talk to me about Doc What you had to go through as a father to be able to be the father that you wanted to be as you went through those peaks and valleys Joe Martin 00 05 00 I think a lot of it s you had a previous guest Docs Talking about watching your kids fail How it s it s so hard to do but man it s so important Even watching them hurt themselves You know when you tell them over and over don t do that Dog Well words mean one thing actions mean another You know when they go and I tried to tell you and then you you know you touch the burning stove or whatever that version of that for your kid is Joe Martin 00 05 19 But That was one I m just watching them fail I mean it s so tough You wanna put them in this you know bubble wrap and send them out the world and don t get hurt Don t have to any challenges but that s not the way the world works Docs And that s not how you grow and that s not how you change That was a tough lesson to learn Also with sports like you mentioned I was an athlete growing up Joe Martin 00 05 35 My son sports important to him He s gonna go play Dault Air Force Academy It s huge opportunity But just looking back on his journey when he first started getting a sport he s telling me oh how good I was back in the day Nobody cares about Dog Right Are you sure about how good you were That doesn t mean anything to these kids Tell them your struggles Tell them that hey man Joe Martin 00 05 51 I had this coach that told me I would never play a down on varsity ever Tell them I was scared the to death to go out of my 1st varsity game I thought I was gonna throw up You know all these things that share your struggles That s where they lean in and connect and they say oh okay Well I struggle I m not very good at this yet Joe Martin 00 06 06 The I just started playing this I don t wanna hear about how good you are I m terrible at this I wanna hear that there s a chance that you struggled and you became better I think as dads you kinda wanna back in the day talk about how good you are and how you the Throw that football over a mountain back in your day But if you can if you can share your struggles I think that was a big lesson that I learned personally that you know they re gonna connect with that much more than they are You talk about how good Door Stuff And then just hey teaching them that your wife their mother is the most important thing in their world And you you do that by you modeling I ll tell Joe Martin 00 06 34 Doc Tell you this what I had one of my mentors tell me one time that put your wife on a pedestal and see what child you raise Put your wife down all the time and see what kind of a person he become Doc You could talk like I said we talked about earlier All these words are very important but they can wanna wanna watch what you do with your actions So if you you know put your wife up on a pedestal to show you how important she is how the She loved all these things and you continue to date your wife love your wife show what love a true relationship looks like That s what they re gonna do But if you go the other way it s Docs Joe Martin 00 07 00 What they re gonna do as well Dr Christopher Lewis 00 07 00 So talk to me about the hardest part that you have found in being a dad to a son and just being a father in general What s been the hardest part for you Joe Martin 00 07 08 I think the hardest part for me is coming Dog He leaves And he goes he s the only child man This is my wife and I s only child We ve been tight since day 1 And and just you know that Daily routine and just checking in and doing all these things And our life pretty much revolves around what he does His activities hanging out with him Doc Joe Martin 00 07 24 Seeing him and his girlfriend what they re doing going to church together all these things I mean like 3 fourths of our days revolves around yo what s he doing Yo man what s he doing What are we doing together What s for dinner That s a big one around here because he s a he s a big kid man so he s always eating That s gonna be tough That s what I like I said our daily routines his basketball games his school dude his laundry I m I m not gonna lie I m not I m not ready for that one to go away but there s a lot of thing I think that s that one s coming up He s been a pretty awesome kid growing up Joe Martin 00 07 50 Probably the ones I ve I ve shared before the biggest struggle just watching him fail along the way and have watching him hurt have his heart broken you know when his 1st girlfriend breaks up and those type of things are so hard to go through Dog I imagine this one coming up is gonna be big When you re going through it right now let me ask you How s that going for you so far Dr Christopher Lewis 00 08 03 You know it is different We but we have 2 kids so we still have 1 at home but They both daughters are very different from one another So my oldest was uber involved in everything So just like your son the We got involved in all the things that she did Whereas my younger daughter is not involved as much Dog In is involved in very few things that she gets involved in And because of that she is just a very different kid And so There is a sense of loss when you as parents when you start missing out on the The things that your kids used to do that you spent a lot of time doing Dr Christopher Lewis 00 08 47 You have to get over it and you have to keep keep going And just because they re Not there and not doing those things doesn t mean you can t go to the basketball games or to the you know if they were in involved in marching band go to the marching band competitions or Or other things like that but it s just different And you have to then adjust and you have to look at the new normal And I know it s gonna be very different when the youngest goes off to college and then we are empty nesters per se And you re only seeing them when they come home for Breaks or in between terms I mean your kid s gonna be going far away from home My kid went about 11 hours away from home Dom Dr Christopher Lewis 00 09 27 So we try to stay in contact through things like FaceTime or through weekly check ins daily check ins but we let her tell us the what the schedule needs to be and try not to push our agenda of wanting to talk to her And I m sure that pretty much every the Parent has to have that kind of a conversation It has to be willing to let go and step back and be willing to let their kid fly a bit And then let them dictate how much or how little that they do communicate I found that I was over communicating a little bit The And my wife came to me and said our daughter has said that you re sending too many things And I said that wasn t my intent The I was just responding to what she was sending me Well she was responding to me because I was sending her something but I was sending too much Dr Christopher Lewis 00 10 20 So I said okay I will step back I won t say anything and I will let her take the lead And it s it s hard to do Dog But you have to do it Joe Martin 00 10 31 For sure Yeah That s what we re looking at And then who are my wife and I when we don t have kids together We have to kinda rekindle that and figure out what we look like together as a couple without the kids So that s gonna be another Docs When you go to Air Force Academy you got 6 week to boot camp 0 communications That s gonna be something that we struggle with right there And then he s gonna be super busy Dog Joe Martin 00 10 47 That s part that s how it works That s how it s supposed to work Talk about flying out of the nest That s how it s supposed to work Right You graduate high school You re supposed to go be your own person and Dog Probably the best way Just rip the Band Aid Joe Martin 00 10 57 Let s get it going Dr Christopher Lewis 00 10 57 That definitely is ripping off the Band Aid when they fly away and they go for the first time That far away we had those conversations about you re not gonna be able to come home You re not gonna be able to constantly be able to just leave for a weekend and take a trip back Because of the expense and the amount of time and we may see you once or twice the in a term And that becomes the reality when your child does go far away But that happens even after they graduate from college or they go the Into the workforce and they move away if they re not gonna be close to home and then you have to deal with that too And you re right though You do have to come to that new reality with your with your partner in life the To be able to figure out who you are again and hopefully along the time along the years that you have been together That you have built a strong foundation so that when all that time and all that effort that you have put into raising your the Child goes away and I say go away It s still there because you re always gonna be a parent but it s different And the house is much quieter and the You re going to have to come up with that new normal so that you still connect and that you then have other things to connect on Outside of all of the effort and time and passion that you put into raising your child Joe Martin 00 12 17 I m not gonna lie I m I m kinda excited to see what it looks like The My wife jokes around that she s just gonna adopt another basketball player We ll do it all over again And I ve I ve nixed that idea but she s she might be serious I m not sure Dr Christopher Lewis 00 12 26 There s been some families that I know that after their child graduates or leaves they may have exchange students or they may do something else Doc To fill that void to be able to or or they get involved with mentoring or they get involved in coaching or they get involved in something else Doc That still connects them with youth in different ways because of the void that they feel internally Joe Martin 00 12 53 Yeah I get that I ve been working with kids for a while Still end up Dom Middle school age is 10 to 14 year old That s when kind of a that s the age it s so crucial and it s it s a tough age So I like to work with that age group I imagine I ll put more resources Docs Joe Martin 00 13 05 That We we did have an opportunity to host a foreign exchange student from Croatia I m not sure if we re gonna do it or not but he s a basketball player So my wife s pretty excited about that So Doug I don t know We ll we ll see what that looks like but you re right man It s gonna be something you can put your energies into Joe Martin 00 13 17 I m excited about that as well Just kinda freeing up that space to to make a difference Dogs Dr Christopher Lewis 00 13 21 Now I know you said you work with a lot of that middle school age population but you also have done a lot with mentoring and and trying to build those strong relationships with not only the kids that you re mentoring but your own son as well And I know you ve done things to be able to better understand what mentoring the is or should be So talk to me about mentoring and the importance of mentoring in kids and what you found the That you ve had to do to be that positive mentor for youth that you work with Joe Martin 00 13 50 Yeah We also talked a little bit before we got on about how we re kinda experts in our field But our kids don t care You know you hear she was talking to your daughter about getting college admission People pay you really good money to do that People pay really good money to me to do fitness Our kids do not care So you kinda need that trusted resource outside of the home that can help like a coach or something like that That s kinda where I d my I got a coaching background Joe Martin 00 14 11 I coach fitness I coach football Doc That s where my background came from So so with some kind of some steps you could do if you re looking to connect with your kid or maybe it s you re an uncle or something like that You wanna help out one Doc Your friend s daughters or something like that You re an aunt Joe Martin 00 14 22 Something like that you wanna help out 1st though you gotta make a connection somehow These kids have to know that you care about them You have your best interest in mind Doc And I m just saying if they like it I love it You know I got kids that they wanna talk about Minecraft Not my favorite subject Joe Martin 00 14 35 I don t know if you re familiar with Minecraft but if they like it I love it So I m gonna find out what is what is about it I m gonna hey What what are you doing with that pickaxe And they re like what do you know about pickaxe I was like well what I Googled That s what I know about it But Dog Just kind of finding the the common ground that we can work from there A lot of the kids I work with they like my dog Joe Martin 00 14 52 We can just talk about my dog because Doug I I don t know if you ve seen that with your kids that it s easier to get them to talk when you re doing an activity rather than sit down and just face to face we re talking like we are right now My son it was Doc Either we ll we ll be in the car and we d be driving so it s not the awkward like staring at each other or we go throw the football or shoot baskets or do something else other than just sit there face to face and have Dads With conversation We ve had some of those some important ones You gotta sit down and do that But to kinda get them to talk to you sometimes it s easier if you re doing an activity So we kinda take it Dog Joe Martin 00 15 21 The approach like for me it s fitness mentoring is what I look at it The kids kinda come in and think oh I m gonna exercise and get a little bit better shape and do some things like this So it s not like Doc Most kids are hey I wanna go get mentored They don t really know what that means but they ve you know I wanna go in there and do some fun exercise move around a little bit Because the first thing you do is gotta make that connection Dom Joe Martin 00 15 39 If you re a parent you probably have that connection with your kid But if you re mentoring another kid you probably need to find some kind of way I recommend looking and finding out what they re most into and you get into it as well Dog And we start there And then far as what we actually do together far as goal setting and things like that I ll talk to the parents I ll talk to the kids and we ll figure out a a realistic goal that they can do Doc Some of them just wanna move around a little bit just feel better Joe Martin 00 15 59 A lot of kids I work with they re not athletes They re more on the computer game side They re ready to play the A video game or or read a book or something like that more artistic or things like that that the physical realm is not really something they re familiar with I mean just getting them moving a little bit is so big as far as mentally the Physically emotionally all these different things because and a lot of them are have to do with bullying So if we can just get talking about that and that s a big thing Dog Especially at that age group It s middle school 5th 6th 7th 8th grade around there Like I said I ve been working with kids about 15 years and social media changed the game Joe Martin 00 16 29 And then COVID changed it even more Even the past 3 years I ve seen a huge difference in how the kids are in the past few years A lot of it gets back to the parents Docs Some of them kinda checked out during the pandemic They re dealing with so much other stuff They kinda checked out and the kids are kinda left to do their own thing Joe Martin 00 16 45 And just getting back in and making a physical connection These kids a lot of them don t have in person friends like we used to growing up that we didn t have choice Doggy The kids in your neighborhood and things like that Some there s kids all around my neighborhood I rarely see them outside We I live right next to a park Joe Martin 00 16 59 And unless there s organized sports Dog Many kids that just go out and play and do physical activities Just kind of getting to reconnect with that and just get kids moving It doesn t matter what kind of movement We re not doing Docs Some kind of serious fitness program or something like that If we can just teach kids some general movement patterns and and we got one because I have a I got hardwood floors in my gym 1 Dog Joe Martin 00 17 18 Kid he likes to take his shoes off I have TRX He likes to slide on his socks on the hardwood floors And we have set up these foam rollers So it s like this Angry Birds game where he knocks over the the Foam rollers like he s bowling himself So it s great movement He s moving He s moving his body Joe Martin 00 17 31 So find find another connection and getting them moving Just those 2 things right there can make a huge difference for these Dr Christopher Lewis 00 17 36 So you ve been doing fitness for a long time and you as I said at the very beginning you have a business called relentless positivity fitness The And and you also have a podcast called relentless positivity podcast And you know you re doing a lot of different things to engage people in different ways kids but also adults To be able to push them to find fitness in their lives what drew you into fitness and why did you decide that this was your your calling and your passion Joe Martin 00 18 04 I was an Athlete all growing up all through high school And then I played football as my main sport Start off as a tight end If you re familiar with football that guy blocks a little bit He catches a little bit I cannot catch very well and I gained a lot of weight Docs So I became a lineman Joe Martin 00 18 15 So if you re familiar with lineman there s like big guys that run into other big guys So so I was playing football I was about 250 260 pounds and I got hurt I was gonna go play in college but I got hurt So Dog I put my whole life into football That was all I care about in high school I just knew I was going all the way Joe Martin 00 18 29 Right I was one of those kids that that that was kind of my identity You know when you re in high school you ve Dog Find your niche and that s who you are I m in the band I m play sports so I do this Whatever it is you kinda put yourself in this box and that s who you are Dog So without that I I kinda felt lost Joe Martin 00 18 41 You know getting arrested and I went to jail And then just all these things started spiraling out of control It got to the point where I was suicidal That s Knowles Passionate about working with these kids because I ve been there too So I kinda got to the point in my life that I gotta do something And I started with losing weight Dog Because I every time I looked in the mirror it s just a reminder that I don t look good I don t feel good and I m not the person I wanna be Joe Martin 00 19 02 So I started Doc With one little thing just I started reading food label They ll label full They ll tell you what s in there how many calories and all these things and what you re putting into your body So I started there and started the Losing weight Like I said I lost 50 pounds I felt great Like man I would love to help other people have the same feeling Joe Martin 00 19 16 So that s where I went from there It s just that that s how I got into the fitness Dog I ve been on the other side where every day you know your body hurts and you don t feel good This is not who I wanna be Not that your weight defines who you are or anything like that Dog But it can be a reminder that man I just I just don t feel good Dr Christopher Lewis 00 19 30 You definitely can feel that way especially as you get older and and the the Lack of movement the lack of of intentional movement I ll say can definitely impact you and lead to the Other health implications in the future Now as fathers I think you said at the beginning you know we need to model the Not only the relationships that we want our kids to have but we also need to model the lifestyle that we want our kids to see And If we are out and we re active and we re actively engaging with them and we re playing shooting baskets or we re out doing walks or running or the At the gym or whatever it might be our kids are gonna see that None They may not follow As you said you ve been doing fitness and your kid doesn t like to listen to you I get that But at the same time though they don t say that they are listening they re listening or they re seeing and it does impact in many different ways Dr Christopher Lewis 00 20 27 So the For a father that is hearing your journey and thinking to themselves I need to take that next step because the I m hurting I can t keep up with my kids I am having a hard time just day to day and I need to do something to start moving the needle The What are some things that they can do to start that Maybe not even going to a gym but just starting something to be able to Docs Start seeing some gains in some aspects Joe Martin 00 20 56 I think the biggest mistake people make and you ll see it in January but when the gym is absolutely packed the 1st 2 weeks of January the And then by week 3 4 it started to look like a ghost town You know they say by 90 days into the new year 90 of people started working out they re done It s over They ve given up So people come in and wanna do I m gonna exercise for 2 hours every day I m gonna eat broccoli and chicken every this is my year and it s not sustainable I suggest you start with something so small that it seems like nothing That you have on a scale of 1 to 10 you re about a 9 or 10 Joe Martin 00 21 27 I could definitely Doc Maybe it s a 5 minute walk I don t know where you are in your journey right now Maybe you need to take a 5 minute walk Walk around the block Maybe you do a couple squats Dog Maybe go and ride your bike Joe Martin 00 21 37 Something so small maybe you just need to drink a little more water and then you start adding these on So if you can just do one thing do it consistently and then you layer things on The 5 minutes this week Maybe you do Maybe you do 7 minutes next week around the block Go a little bit further Because what you ll find usually if you start with that 5 minutes oh well I can do 10 today With the whole thing the As humans we re we re built to conserve energy Joe Martin 00 21 57 Right That s just kinda through evolution That s what got us here So naturally we are quote unquote lazy Docs That s just your body trying to save you from doing we re not supposed to be out there running marathons Right So if you can do that if you can just talk yourself into that 5 minutes Doc Usually a lot more will actually happen But if not at least you got that 5 minutes in Joe Martin 00 22 14 You re getting consistent with it Because don t be the person that goes in and they just Dog Have an amazing 1 week in January and then the other 51 weeks they do not get I d much rather you come in slow Number 1 you re not gonna hurt yourself like a lot of people do Doc It s gonna be sustainable and you re gonna go slowly add these on where it s not overwhelming and it s sustainable You want a plan that s sustainable that you actually enjoy If you can find a way to move your body that the like don t not what someone told you is the best way to burn fat or build muscle or all this Joe Martin 00 22 42 What do you like to do I remember years ago at my church there was this guy Dog 80 year old man He kinda came up to me He s like oh asking me these fitness questions He said well this is kind of embarrassing but I like to do hip hop abs He had a VCR tape with Sean Tee This guy did hip hop ads The guy is probably not the target market for this video but he did it all the time and he did great Joe Martin 00 23 02 It s like that s not embarrassing man That s awesome I wish I was in my eighties doing a hip hop ab routine That s very cool So it s just finding a way you enjoy moving your body and doing on a consistent basis Doc And be amazed at what other habits start coming in Because you start exercising a little more well maybe I ll start eating a little bit better because maybe I can you know do a little bit better in my class that I m taking or I go a little bit further Joe Martin 00 23 21 Drink a little more water none of them exercising more And maybe if you cut down on my drinking a little bit and all these things start kinda layering in But if you try to do them all at once they all tend to just fall off Dr Christopher Lewis 00 23 31 Definitely I ve seen that as well And you re completely right You get into that mode of the New Year s resolutions And you say oh I m gonna do this I m gonna do that And a lot of times the bar is set so high it s really hard to maintain And the So then at the end you end up failing And and that says something to your kids do and they see that The Indeed I I think you re completely right when you say that you start small and start something just to start something and then work up from there The Doesn t mean you have to be ready for an ultra marathon a month into working out Dr Christopher Lewis 00 24 08 You re not gonna be there and that s okay You just have to take the time to prepare Doc And to move toward the goals that you want to set and be and then go from there as well Joe Martin 00 24 18 And I think it s very important to let your kids see you struggle with exercise If it s tough you don t don t hide that from your kid Let them see because they re gonna be there one day whether it s it s an injury or maybe they ll let themselves get out of shape or maybe they don t exercise at all now But they see you Docs Doing that dead I love to see people who look like they haven t exercised in a way but they re out there doing it That s the people that people try to make fun of and things like that I love to see people out there So Docs Joe Martin 00 24 39 Those are people that haven t given up I think that says much more to your kids than someone who s always stayed in shape and things like that It s so hard to start Doc Just whatever it is it s so hard to get going If you can just get started that s usually the hardest part So letting your kids see that it s okay to struggle They ll they ll Put that maybe they re not fitness or something like that Joe Martin 00 24 55 Maybe it s school or or relationships or things like that Seeing you struggle and not give up is so important Like you Talked About Modeling That s a huge thing right there Dr Christopher Lewis 00 25 03 It definitely is Now I know I mentioned the fact that you also have a podcast and a book Doc Talk to me about those And what are people gonna find if they you know listen in to your relentless positivity podcast or they pick up the book itself What s your hope that the When someone listens or when they read what are they gonna take out of Joe Martin 00 25 21 those With the podcast I started that during the pandemic I think a lot of people found a little no time on their hands I wrote the book during the pandemic as well It s just all I saw on the news was negativity and that s what was kinda was just everywhere Whether you re reading or watching the news or anything like that I just wanna counterbalance that with having people on there that are like yourself that are doing amazing things out in the world that maybe people don t they haven t heard about it that need to be highlighted Noor stories or people out there that are changing the worlds in their neighborhood Those unsung heroes I love to highlight them And just fun stories and maybe some dad jokes in there Joe Martin 00 25 51 You know those are very important Docs And things like that They weren t getting shared So I just that s why I started that and it s just what we re doing And then with the book I just wanted to have it s kinda more I call it infotainment Doc Right So I share stories from my life to kinda have some lessons about how you can lose weight get in shape and have less back pain and things like that Joe Martin 00 26 06 That they re not about here s Docs Exactly what to do and why you re an idiot if you don t do it this way There s options There s ways to do it There s strategies and things like that And some inspiration All those things that I Dog I think there s a lot of negativity in the fitness world that people if you don t do it this way then there s no other way to do it Joe Martin 00 26 22 So this kinda would giving people options giving them inspiration and you re doing it the In a positive manner because it s gonna get tough You know how do you handle the rough times when they come in Whether it s you know life or your fitness or things like that Do you handle the tough times That s what s gonna define who you are and what you succeed in life about So I just wanna kinda help people out with that Just see I just trying to fill needs that I thought were not being filled So that s kinda why the Start with the book as well as the podcast Dr Christopher Lewis 00 26 43 Oh we always finish our interviews with what I like to call our fatherhood five where I ask you 5 more questions to delve deeper into you as a dad Are you ready Joe Martin 00 26 50 I m ready Dr Christopher Lewis 00 26 50 The In one word what is fatherhood Joe Martin 00 26 52 Strength Dr Christopher Lewis 00 26 53 When s the time that you finally felt like you succeeded at being a father Joe Martin 00 26 56 I think when my son did his commitment to the Air Force Dog To play basketball Man that was just a culmination of all these years of watching him struggle and become who he is as a man It s just it was a great moment Dr Christopher Lewis 00 27 06 Now if I was to talk to your son How would he describe you as a dad Joe Martin 00 27 10 Goofy yet serious about discipline Dr Christopher Lewis 00 27 12 Who inspires you to be a better dad Joe Martin 00 27 14 That s my dad I watched it growing up Got to see it Firsthand best dad ever Dr Christopher Lewis 00 27 18 Now you ve given a lot of piece of advice today as we finish up What s 1 piece of advice you d wanna give to every dad Joe Martin 00 27 24 Don t give up on Yeah Doc I wanna look back on my life when I was like I said I was in jail been on probation all these different things My life did not look that great Don t give up on those kids Just a snapshot of my life It looked like I was going nowhere Joe Martin 00 27 36 I had no future nothing going on Wasn t very good at school The Literally did not how to know how to spell the word business Spelled it wrong till I got to college It didn t look good but my parents never gave up on me And I ve turned it around Dog And your kids Dr Christopher Lewis 00 27 48 can too Well Joe I really appreciate you being here today If people wanna find out more about you and what you re doing where s the best place for them to go I Joe Martin 00 27 55 can go to my website the fit and positive com You can look it s got the link for the podcast It s got the book on there the mentoring program if you wanna know If you just wanna talk about how you can help your kids you the With the mentoring or anything like that you can reach out It s got my contact information on there Before I go if you re listening right now you need to stop and give this man Docs A 5 star review on whatever podcast platform you re listening for We need more strong dads out there raising strong daughters and he s doing the world a the Good service out here Joe Martin 00 28 19 Give him a 5 star review He deserved it You know you ve listened to him before He deserved your 5 stars You do that right now Dr Christopher Lewis 00 28 24 Well I appreciate you saying that Joe And I truly do appreciate all that you re doing to be able to inspire kids around you inspire your own son as he prepares for the future and I wish you all the best Joe Martin 00 28 35 Thank you very much Thank you for having me on This is great Keep up the great work I d love to have you on my podcast as well Dr Christopher Lewis 00 28 39 If you ve enjoyed today s episode of the Dads with Daughters podcast we invite to check out the fatherhood insider The fatherhood insider is the essential resource for any dad that wants to be the best dad that he can be We know that no child comes with an instruction manual and most dads are figuring it out as they go along And the fatherhood insider is full of resources and information the that will up your game on fatherhood Through our extensive course library interactive forum step by step road maps the And more You will engage and learn with experts but more importantly dads like you So check it out at fathering together org If you are a father of a daughter and have not yet joined the Dads with Daughters Facebook community there s a link in the notes today Dr Christopher Lewis 00 29 26 Daughters is a program of fathering together We look forward to having you back for another great guest next week all geared to helping you raise strong empowered daughters the And be the best dad that you can be We re all in the same boat the and it s full of tiny screaming passengers We spend the time We give the lessons We make the meals We buy them presents Bring your A game because those kids are growing fast The time goes by just Dog Like a dynamite blast calling astronauts and firemen carpenters Domino s Be the best dad you can be Click here to visit this podcast episode

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